


Cock and Bull

by okbutjusthisonce



Series: RFU [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Alpha Sherlock, Darts, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Mpreg, Omega John, Omega Verse, Porn, Pregnancy Kink, Size Kink, british bros, pints, player!John
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-13
Updated: 2013-06-13
Packaged: 2017-12-14 21:50:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/841766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/okbutjusthisonce/pseuds/okbutjusthisonce
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John does Greg a favor.<br/>This one could possibly go with "RFU".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cock and Bull

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sad it came out so long... 1070 words!
> 
> Please let me know what you think.

"Awwww! Already?" Lestrade wrinkled his nose in protest as John pulled off his jacket, revealing his swollen belly.

"I was just getting hopeful we'd win a few." He said, aiming carefully. The dart landed with a satisfying thunk. “...not to mention I just topped up my league dues.”

"I'll be around a while yet," said John. Lestrade took a swig of his pint as John took the darts and aimed at the board.

"That's a load of bollocks." He said to John's back, "it's always the same when you're preggers. First the crazy flirty period, then Sherlock gets jealous and hides you away, then you're too much of a beached whale to do anything. You’ll be MIA for the next year!"

"Six months, give or take." corrected John, pulling his darts from the board. "That’s only a half year. Your turn."

“The lads are gonna be upset... do you realize we’re going to have to replace you with someone, and that someone may well be Laurence?”

“What about Andy?”

“He’s been deep in the dog house ever since he got caught with what’s-her-name-big-tits. No pub time for him either, for a long whil-”

John winced as Lestrade’s last dart landed in the wall. He followed his friends’ distracted gaze to the table to their left. Sitting down were three women. Two were reasonably attractive. The third was an over-the-top blonde girl; the obvious reason Lestrade's dart was sticking out of the autographed picture of Simon Groom rather than the board.

John smiled.

“Hot in here...” he said shrugging off his wooly jumper.

"God, Please! Tell me you're not wearing that."

“What?” said John with a smile of mock innocence. The t-shirt had been a gag gift from some of the lads at the station ages ago. Lestrade tried to recall for exactly which pregnancy of John’s; it was back when they were still doing baby showers and the like.

“You know exactly how much that thing makes me cringe. It’s completely daft.” He said. John grinned, clearly enjoying his friend’s discomfort.

“Some people like it,” he said, and then, “She’s an alpha, you know.”

Lestrade felt himself blush just slightly.

“What are you saying? She’s out of my league?”

“Just... well you might have to work a bit, and revise your usual strategy.” said John, amused. Lestrade looked at John, snorted defensively, and moved to cross the pub.

“Wait.” said John, grabbing Lestrade’s arm. “let me go over first.” He handed Lestrade the darts, and made his way to the table.

 

…...........................

****

“Hiya,” said Mark. He handed Lestrade a new pint, “what’s been going on?”

“Thanks mate.” Lestrade said nodding his head in John’s general direction.

“What, is he up the duff again? Already?”

“Not surprised are you?” Lestrade sighed.

“Awww, no, does this mean we’re going to have to ask Laurence?” Mark sat down with a sigh.

“I’ve just ordered our jackets,” he complained. “ _with our names._ ”

“We’ll just have to change John’s to say ‘Laurence’ then, won’t we.” grumbled Lestrade.

“That won’t work! Just think of the kearning -”

“Just look at that.” interrupted Lestrade shaking his head. Across the room John was sitting in between the women, the obvious center of attention. John was pointing at the t-shirt, they were all laughing. And _touching_ him. The blonde alpha began rubbing his belly.

“How does he do that?!” groaned Mark.

Lestrade took a big swallow of his lager as he watched John being fawned over. It never failed to intrigue and disturb him how his friend seemed to become overly magnetic in his current state. Something in the pheromones he supposed. He thought about it more than he cared to admit.

“Betas like us will never know, mate.” he answered firmly.

John looked up, and beckoned Lestrade over.

“d’you reckon a foam tummy would work?” Mark was saying. Lestrade passed Mark the darts.

“Back in a mo.” he said.

 

…...........................

****

“Hi Greg,” the blonde woman (whose name turned out to be Naomi and looked even more amazing up close) was saying, “John was just telling us how much you’ve been helping him out.” Her arm was curled around John’s shoulder in a cliché, protective alpha gesture, but she was looking straight at Lestrade.

“He has? Oh, well, I do what I can.” said Lestrade with a nervous smile.

“It must be so hard for you John, with your alpha stuck in Afghanistan.” said one of the other girls - both of whose names Lestrade had promptly jettisoned. He looked at John who sat there somehow radiating ‘cute’. Lestrade considered that John was the strangest omega he’d ever met; he could be hard as nails in one moment, soft as a lamb in the next, and was able to work each aspect to his advantage.

“I’d be terrified - first baby and all - if it wasn’t for Greg. He’s very nurturing, it’s like having another omega around for support.” John said, looking endearingly at Lestrade. Lestrade felt himself actually blush.

Naomi gave Lestrade a beautiful, predatory smile.

“I think that’s wonderful.” she said.

“Greg’s the best.” agreed John.

 …...........................

****

“Why do you smell like alpha and Chanel No.5 ?” demanded Sherlock. He ran his nose over John a second time. “and Lestrade.” he added. The jealousy that had been brewing in his eyes subsided as he deduced the scenario. John gave Sherlock a naughty look and pressed his mouth to the underside of Sherlock’s jaw. Sherlock replied with a soft grunt of pleasure despite himself.

“Too clever for your own good, aren’t you?” John asked.

“You look very pleased with yourself, John. I hope Greg is grateful to you.”

“Ha! At this rate, he’ll be babysitting for us the next ten years.”

“Still, maybe its time to stay out of the pub for a while.” Sherlock suggested sulkily.

John placed Sherlock’s long hands on the mound of his stomach. He pushed forward into Sherlock’s palms.

“There’s the alpha I know and love to fuck,” John said, moving Sherlock’s hands over his swollen form, “You know you’ll have to keep me distracted more often - if you want me to stay home more often.”

Almost before he’d finished his sentence, Sherlock had grabbed John’s hips and twisted him round. He pushed John against the countertop with a low possessive growl. John gasped in delight as Sherlock pulled John’s trousers down in one swift motion and mounted him from behind, pushing his big alpha cock deep inside.

“Bullseye.” John breathed.

 

**Author's Note:**

> John's a bit of a manipulative thang. At least when he's pregnant. 
> 
> What do you think his cheesy t-shirt says?


End file.
